LOL viruses...but on a serious note, theyre not funny.
They fag up your computer
So im writing this article rating virus scanners.

There are two types of scanners.
Home based and INT based.

Home based are antivirus proctection software that live on your computer.
Internet base - none or only a small fraction of working files actually reside on your computer.

Home based
Disadvantages for home based scanners the most exploited and common weakness is that just like the human defense system...it can catch AIDS. i.e. the effectiveness of the program can be disabled [which is noticable] or it can be dampened which is harder for you to discern.[You may think your computer is fine].
Advantages: Theyre fast and always on.

Internet based
Good too but obviously arent feasible for round the clock protection.

Disadvantages : Theyre deathly slow [ok not deathly, but its pretty slow]
Sometimes viruses block you from going to online scanner sites or any AVsite for that matter.

Advantages : Not so easy to jack up like Home based AV.Usually multipurpose and you dont need to update your virus definitions.

Home based AV
My top programs

Norton {Internet Security , 360 [Faster] }
Been around for a while,Top of most the charts in AV care.Its a heavy program however,expect some lag if your computer sucks. 3Gigs of ram is nice and a non-sucky processor

Kaspersky [Only the latest]
I wont lie kaspersky is good , but its not as subtle as Norton.Norton is like a spy that slips though all the data going in and out your internet connection and takes out the hacker, silently, like a ninja.Kaspersky kinda runs out with a battle axe and a rocket launcher.The hacker will be blocked either way but your download speeds might not like it if you choose the latter.

Bit defender is decent
Nod 32 [Is ok]
McAfee[Is ok]

AVG is a lower ok...Only if your getting updates maybe...expect false positives and viruses slipping through

These are absolutely useless antivirus.USELESS.I rage over the fact people are making money off that crap...

Internet based scanners
My alltime favourite is

TrendMicro House call
Extremely thorough, searches for not only virus but fixes holes in your firewall that trojans can get through{Vulnerabilities]
so XP users this is for you

Windows live one care [In beta for vista users]
Technically inept people - Beta is like a 75-60% completed construct Alpha is 30-60%
Slow, but thorough.Will defragment your hard drive** , Delete temporary files and other obsolete data [I gained 5 gigs of info that i otherwise would not have been able to delete] and check for fire wall problems.It slow though. 
** Optional -Makes it take even longer

These are pretty much the only good ones i know

Single file scanners
Utility to check if ONE file is infected.It scans the file using 20 different antivirus software and gives you the results that each software would have given to you.It does not remove the virus however, and is only used to determine the likelihoood of infection

Read their disclaimers

Kaspersky is a bit gruff in it AV methods, but nothing is more violent than Combofix
.It is a ultimate last resort when you have a virus, and you know for sure you have one but its not going away.Especially if it likes to reload itself after restarting.

Last resort.
It deleted a couple dll's on my desktop comp[Which I replaced easily cause I'm so smart :P]
USE with caution.

Formatting [Oh NASTY...]
Yea...i try VERY hard to avoid doing this.You have no guarantee that after formatting the virus will not reload itself and all your file loss will be for naught

MANUALLY deleting viruses[ Gruelling torture]
Ive only done this once and it was hell.I dont mean clicking on the file that says iamson0tavirus.exe and pressing delete.I mean goin in your registries and changing 789273ghg24g34gh to 234783927ghfhfj~92....a couple hundred times. Really Gay.

O yea. Payin for these things is the one thing i think is worth spending money on.But you can always tief it and get blacklisted every couple months or so then just reinstall with a differecnt key.

But paying is good

.I dont think im bored enough to write how to avoid viruses so yea im gone now


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